SCROOGE, GRINCH, BOEHNER

John Boehner is acting all Grinchy.

If you don't know, John Boehner was not so long ago an obscure Ohio Congressman best known for the eerie orange glow of his epidermis gathered from long hours spent in tanning booths.  Why a grown man from Ohio where gray skin tones are the norm due to the six or seven months of dreary, overcast winters would waste his life laying in tanning beds is a mystery for the ages.

But then – proving that there is a Santa Claus -- Boehner became the Speaker of the House.  No one was probably more surprised by this unlikely development than Boehner himself.

Boehner was beside himself with JOY.  Becoming Speaker of the House is apparently a big deal if you're a politician (yawn).  It caused Boehner to cry right on the floor of the House.  Boehner's CUP OF JOY overflow-ith.  People were glad for John Boehner, that he would be so impressed with what seems a relatively minor thing, unless you're a politician.

But then Boehner's JOY turned to ashes in his mouth.

Lots of TV pundits who keep track of these things and then talk about them on political shows say that Boehner is caught between a cliff and a hard place.  That's because 70% of the American people say taxes should be raised on the richest 2% of tax payers, but Tea Baggers in Boehner's Republican House say NO WAY MAN WE'RE NOT RAISING THE TAXES ON BILLIONAIRES WE'RE GONNA CUT BENEFITS TO POOR CHILDREN AND OLD PEOPLE INSTEAD.

Boehner doesn't know what to do.  If he listens to 70% of the American people he will make the Tea Baggers angry and if he listens to the Tea Baggers then we will all GO OFF THE FISCAL CLIFF.  TOGETHER.  AAAAHHHHH!!!

It's a dilemma, for sure, so Boehner hit on the idea of blaming it all on Pres. O.  It's the O's fault if we all GO OFF THE FISCAL CLIFF.  

Even though … the Senate passed a fiscal package months ago that Pres. O says he'd sign.  But Boehner refuses to bring the Senate package to a vote in the House where pundits who know about these things say it would sail right on through.

Here's the Grinchy part of the story.  Boehner went up to the White House a week ago for a little Christmas party to light the Christmas tree and have a glass of egg nog (yuck) and eat a Christmas cookie or two and regale the attendees about his adventures in tanning beds.

When it was time to have the event recorded for future generations by the White House photographer Boehner refused to have his picture took with the O.

That's very Grinchy. 

It doesn't speak well of a man who fanatically  uses tanning beds.

Politicians need to put their differences aside at Christmas parties.  John Boehner should remember the words of Jesus, who is the reason for the season  – "Render unto Ceaser what is Ceasers."

That doesn't seem to fit does it?  Maybe it's the one about stones –"Let ye who is without sin cast the first stone."

Or the fishes? – "Follow me and I will make ye fishers of men."

I can't think of it right now but I'm sure something Jesus said would apply to Boehner's boorish behavior at the White House Christmas party.

If you have any ideas let me know.